Whether that was to have a conversation with their parents about marriage or to go travelling. It just opened their eyes to more choice.

Not long after that I also started fostering – I wanted more of my own children but hadn’t met anyone at the time so I decided to offer myself and my home for foster children. I was recruited to look after any BAME children in Gloucester that needed fostering but that never happened. All the children I fostered were white! Looking back I realise this really taught me a lot about understanding and tolerance. For example one of the children I was looking after really was looking forward to Christmas.

Although we wouldn’t normally celebrate Christmas at home we did a few things for this little boy because it really mattered to him. We decorated his bedroom and bought a little Christmas  tree which really made him happy. Then my sister in law and I made a fantastic Christmas Day breakfast. 

I found a new understanding and tolerance and acceptance. I also realised these small things we do with each other and for each other can have a very long lasting impact.

For a few years I was fostering and also rearing my own children but as soon as I could I wanted to do more. It was just after 911, when there was a lot of prejudice and misunderstanding around. There was next to nothing available that was women only.  So I set up and ran a women’s only mother and baby group where women could feel safe to remove their face coverings. 

Setting up a Day centre for elderly women and women with disabilities was the next step, with only  6 women at the beginning. I set up a day centre where women could come, meet, eat, try out new activities and have each other’s support. The same women become my support and encouragement to keep at it. Hearing their stories of challenge, and survival were I think key in shaping my future. Enabling all sections of the community to have  a voice. I remember saying goodbye with a very special sense of achievement and 28 women in the group. 

After some time away, I applied for another job at the Friendship. I didn’t get the job but following my interview, Haroon, who is on the management committee and who interviewed me, rang me and offered me something else I was more suited to. It was only 5 hours per week but it was a start! That gave me the foothold I needed to create opportunities for supporting women.

Those 5 hours soon became many voluntary hours every week. 

Throughout my journey there has always been someone with an open mind who has given me a chance to develop my ideas and address the need that I identified. I have had the ideas and they have given me a place or a platform to make it happen. At the Friendship café the co-ordinator Imran and the management committee supported me in bringing my insight into the organisation so that we could create a more diverse organisation. Way back when I was 19yrs old it was Denise Tate ( a youth worker at Glos Youth Service) who gave me the support to set up the young women’s Youth Group. More recently it has been Emma.

I am sure my interest in community comes from my parents who were very active in bringing people together.

Nowadays, I am able to support other women in the same way by supporting them in their ambitions whether that’s by organising training courses or informal mentoring.